Poems and writings

Nonhuman in a human society

honestly, being a part of this community for more than a year, I've never felt the need of doing quads and wearing masks that younger members of the community make or do. no shame to these individuals, obviously, every being to their business, but quads to me are painful and hurt my wrists, neck and back. also, the masks are uncomfortable, but maybe that's just me. I tried to make one, but I find it uncomfortable. very uncomfortable. it limits my vision a lot. also, I don't see myself wearing it in public, as I'm very shy.

yes, I'm proud to be alterhuman. and if anyone finds out about this part of my identity, and they ask about it, I'll happily share. but my identity is part of myself, and it's private. I'm alterhuman, but only the ones closest to me know, the ones who would accept me unconditionally (also, to explain some of my behaviours around them, as I have some strong instincts that are weird on a human context).

I have a job. I feed myself, live with my family. I get up and chill and go to work and make myself meals, and go on walks, and go to uni, and earn a salary. but I'm still nonhuman. I'm a dog while I study for my exams. I'm a winged cat when I take orders at my job. I'm a watcher while I write a report, while I pay my taxes, while I play with my dog. my headmates are with me when I clean my living space.

Internally and externally, I'm as nonhuman as it can get. but I'm an adult, so my identity is not very relevant to my day to day life. it's still there, and still a huge part of who I am, of course. I still want to growl, to bark, to hiss, to bare my teeth, to rise my wings beside me when I'm scared, to purr when I'm happy, to whistle to birds when I'm excites. but I still live in a human society. almost a double life, almost hiding, but still myself